Director: Worth Keeter, Thom McIntyre, Earl Owensby, Todd Durham
Starring: Fran Taylor, Kevin Campbell, Bob Bloodworth
I have always been a fan of horror anthologies. You get several stories that are short and doesn’t need extra fat to stretch the it out into 90 minutes. Tales of the Third Dimension has narration between the stories are done by a corpse named Igor, who is joined by three vultures who think they have jokes for days. Igor is no Cryptkeeper, but you can’t really dislike a talking corpse now can you?
The first story is called Young Blood and is about two colleagues, Ms. Marquette and Dudley, from an adoption company who are going to see a new couple who wants to adopt a young kid. This couple, who goes by Count and Countess, seems to have Ms. Marquette under a spell and Dudley doesn’t like them one bit. In the end the Counts gets the new kid they want, but he seems to be too much to handle, even for a vampire couple!
This episode is done by Thom McIntyre, who has also done Dogs of Hell (1982). This part goes on for about 25 minutes and I take it as a kind of tribute to older horror movies with the typical cheesy vampire acting and cliché customes. It’s not too bad though, the settings in the old house looks alright and it’s a decent time waster.
The second story is called The Guardians and is made by Worth Keeter, who were also apart of Dogs of Hell and has spent a lot of time on the Power Rangers TV series. This one is set in the 1800’s and is about two grave robbers who gets too greedy when they enter an old, abandoned tomb to rob the corpses. The tale is very Tales of the Crypt-ish and is actually well executed, but not something you will remember for a long time.
The third and final story is about two kids who are celebrating their christmas at their grandma’s house. Things turn deadly when grandma is out of her pills and starts to go crazy. The grandma, played by Helene Tryon is just hilarious in this one. This segment is done by Todd Durham and it sets itself apart in that it relies mostly on comedy. It becomes a little too silly during the end, but it is the most memorable one of these three stories.
Tales of the Third Dimension is alright. They did a good job with what they had here, cause this is obviously a very low budget effort. It doesn’t really set itself apart from other movies though and it’s not something that you would want to revisit. It also has some effects that I guess are supposed to be in 3D. The effects kind of sit there for a few seconds, making it just stupid when you see it in regular 2D.