Director: Adam Green
Starring: Joel David Moore, Tamara Feldman, Deon Richmond, Kane Hodder, Mercedes McNab
It’s not a remake. It’s not a sequel. And it’s not based on a Japanese one.
Hatchet takes place on Mardi Gras in New Orleans. A group of friends are trying to have a good time, but Ben is being a partypooper since he is missing his ex-girlfriend and he wants to do something else than drink alcohol and find some easy chicks to entertain himself with. He is joined by his friend Marcus on a swamp tour together with other weird characters and a cheesy tour guide.
After driving a boat around the swamps for a bit they have an accident, which makes their boat unusable and now they have to continue the night on foot through the woods. They come across a legendary mutant killer who is doing everything he can to kill them off one by one.
I’m not sure what Adam Green (Cheerleader Camp, Hatchet 2) was trying to do with this project. At times it feels like it is parodying the slasher films and if that is the case than it really missed it’s mark since it is neither funny or does anything different from the bad slasher movies of the 80’s. It if’s an homage, then it’s one with a middle finger at the older slashers since it takes all the parts that are not good in the old ones and highlights them here. If it’s suppose to be a new slasher then it just fails on doing anything new and interesting. While the movie does look good with a muddy and wet forest, there’s nothing else that would make you check out the future movies of Green.
The acting and the characters are crap. Our main guy Ben, played by Joel David Moore (Avatar, Shark Night 3D) is a nerdy and moopy guy who is more annoying than anything else. His sidekick Marcus is suppost to be the jokester and is played by Deon Richmond (Scream 3, Van Wilder). His only addition to the movie is being nearly the most irritating and annoying character, only loosing that “award” to Mercedes McNab (Beer Money, Hatchet 2) as Misty. The monster who is called Crowley (a nod to Ozzy perhaps?) is cartoonish, muscular and deformed. He is played by Kane Hodder who horrorfans love from the later Friday the 13th’s of the 80’s. The look of the monster is kind of silly and he is shown too much and not scary at all, if that was what they where even going for. The few gore scenes are done quite nicely and is the only highlight together with the brief nudity in the movie.
Hatchet is a ridiculous movie who at the time of writing this has spawned two sequels. It’s poorly done and a poor concept that we have seen done better thousands of times by now and offer nothing else but annoyance. It’s more silly than anything else and if a comedic slasher is your cup of tea, then enjoy if you can.