Genre: Horror / Comedy
Director: Jackie Kong
Starring: Rick Burks, Carl Crew, Roger Dauer, LaNette La France, Lisa Elaina
First they greet you, then they eat you
The Tutman family is devoted to the ancient goddess Shitaar. The two youngest members, Michael and George has opened up a successful vegetarian diner where they serve anything but meals made by healthy vegetables. Their menu, unbeknownst to their guests, consist of every parts available on the human body.
They are using their diner as home base where they bring in their victims to slaughter and dismember them, keeping the parts needed to bring Shitaar back to life and serving the rest to their customers. The end of the world might be near if this powerful and evil force is unleashed upon it.
Blood Diner was originally supposed to be made as a sequel to the classic cheesy gore flick Blood Feast by H.G. Lewis. Since the producers weren’t able to secure the rights, they instead turned this project into a humorous tribute to the original film.
Blood Diner is a bad and silly movie, but that’s basically all that it is aspiring to be as well. If you don’t like movies that try to be “so bad it’s good” then you can stop reading right away and find something else to check out instead. This film goes for cheap laughs instead of attempting to create suspense and horror. Yeah, there might be some gore here and there, but it is done cheesy on purpose to make it more funny than shocking.
I am usually not a big fan of these type of movies as they have a tendency to become a bit too silly for my taste. There seems to be a bit more effort put in to this one though and it does become an entertaining little film. There’s not just cheap and easy humour here, although that’s a big part of it, but also scenes that have some thought put into them.
I don’t have that much to say about the actors or the characters. They are all ok, but this isn’t exactly Shakespear material to work with either. Director Jackie Kong did have a few films under her belt before tackling this story, with the most known if you can even call them that being Night Patrol with Linda Blair and the Sci-Fi horror The Being from 1983. Blood Diner was her last directorial job.
Blood Diner reeks of 80’s cheese and fun. It is borderline Troma at times and it is a film that has no rights being as much fun as it is. It has a talking brain in a jar, an ancient goddess, vegetarian store serving human meat and topless aerobic dancers. It is wacky, silly and that’s all that it intended to be.